It’s my dream job and my family are holding me back! Help!

Dear Aunty B,

I have just been offered a fantastic job that I have been wanting for years (my boss has just resigned), but I have just learnt that they are restructuring and have moved the position to Sydney.

That would mean uprooting my teenage girls and asking my husband to leave the job that he loves. But I have also been working for the past 14 years for this job and know that if I turn it down it will be seen as a sign that I am not serious about progressing in my career.

I love this company but I have been doing the same job for five years and desperately want to progress.

Torn,

Melbourne

Dear Torn,

Congratulations. Hope you have a headache from too much champagne. Now for the reality.

There is no bigger headache than two unhappy teenage girls made to move cities or a grumpy husband who feels controlled by an upwardly mobile wife. Sad? Yes. Pathetic? Yes. True? Yes. Frustrating? Abso-bloody-lutely!

But ultimately your happiness and ability to give your job 100% focus is partly derived from your family being contented and settled – and we all know that middle-aged husbands and hormonally insane teenage daughters are worse than labour.

However, there is no reason to give up your ambition. What you have to do is bend the company to your will. That job is being moved to Sydney. Why? Does the restructure mean all parts have to go to Sydney? Have they heard of the internet? Skype, instant messaging, planes?

What you need to do is dissect your job. What can you do better than anyone else? What do they know you do better than anyone else? How can the job be restructured so that you can still carry out most of it from Melbourne? Be determined to do this and use your best negotiating skills and left brain thinking to get the result you want!

Be smart,

Your Aunty B

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