My friend is also my direct report. Help!

Dear Aunty,

I am in a very difficult situation and I am hoping you can help.

Several years ago I was promoted to a senior level within my organisation and ever since things have been very tense with a woman in the team. She and I were very close and she resents my promotion.

Last week she was made a direct report of mine and I have to do her performance review in June. Her work, while of an okay standard, is not productive enough and she takes criticism as a direct attack on her. But if I am to meet my KPIs she has to meet hers. While I am ambitious, she isn’t at all!

The problem is she is part of my friendship circle so I run into her at social functions at least four times a year, where she once made a sarcastic comment about my need for control and power although she apologised later. I am dreading the performance review and don’t know how to handle the whole situation! Should I start as the friend, explaining that this is a difficult situation or start as her manager?

Help!

Dear Help,

Get over yourself. You are a boss. Why are you even asking? There is a job to be done and you need the right person in that job. You and she are never going to share a common approach so don’t try. Explain to your employee the things going well and where she can improve. Run through her KPIs and how you will measure improvement. Make sure with a person who takes criticism personally that you are talking about skills, the job and KPIs that can be measured. In your head separate the person in your friendship circle from the job that needs to be done.

When you meet socially avoid all talk of work. Yes it will probably always be a little uncomfortable but so what? You can cope with that.

Be smart,
Your Aunty B

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