How easy are you to work with?

Most of us like to think we are efficient and effective. Yet if this is the case, why is it that so many of us become frustrated with those we are supposed to work with? There are many managers that are adept at pointing out the faults of others but when it comes to self-analysis there can be a wide gap between perception and reality.

We all work within larger networks and industries outside our direct working environment, and this increasing inter-connectedness means that being easy to work with is more important than it ever has been.

The most common complaints

Poor turnaround times, being too demanding, making too many errors and rudeness are all examples of common complaints about co-workers, contractors and suppliers. Most of them come from the disparity between what is expected and what is delivered. Frustration is created when someone receives treatment or work that is at a standard significantly below what they expect to receive.

The starting point for resolution is to recognise and clarify the issue, rather than rush to blame and complain.

Competing goals

This is a common concern for any working relationship. When you have two parties that are pursuing different goals, but are relying on each other, there is a high possibility of friction.

The important this to do here is to focus on the common ground – the aspects of the task that you both need. The fact that you are working together means that common ground does exist. Focus on this.

Confusing easy to work with, with submissiveness

Being easy to work with should not be mistaken for being submissive. But it doesn’t mean we should swing the other way and be too demanding and difficult.

Avoid false promises

The people you work with often make plans around the promises you make. If you are telling managers, co-workers, suppliers or customers that something will be ready by a particular date – you need to make sure you stick to this. These stakeholders need to be informed as soon as there is a potential derailing of the plan. Scurrying to get something finished by a deadline only to tell the other party that you didn’t quite get there because of a delay elsewhere makes you look extremely unprofessional and results in frustration and possibly embarrassment for the person you’re working for.

Make the same demands of yourself that you place on others

This is a piece of advice that can cause some angst within a workplace as everyone has a different capacity. But by making your demands clear, and delivering the same degree of quality/timeliness as what you demand – you will ensure that everyone you work will find you predictable and easier to work with.

Treat people like people

Why do we need to be reminded? Rudeness, lack of gratitude and condescension are all acts that result in people being less inclined to want to work well with you. One of the easiest changes you can make right now is to start showing more appreciation for the work that is done for you. If it is high quality, make sure you thank the person who completed it. If someone has moved mountains to meet your demands, congratulate them. It will be so much more likely that the next encounter with this person will be a productive one.

Test yourself on this ‘How easy are you to work with?’ Questionnaire:

1. I tend to find someone to blame when something goes wrong OR I look for a reason rather than a scapegoat.
2. People know not to mess with me! OR People are comfortable asking me for help or explaining their difficulties to me.
3. I can have fun and still get a lot done OR Laughter and hard work are mutually exclusive.
4. I’d prefer to put in extra time than to let someone down OR I’m employed to work 9-5, if I don’t finish it by 5pm, tough!
5. People like to help me out because they know I’d do the same for them OR Nobody ever offers to help me, I have to drag it out of people.
6. Everyone knows exactly what I expect and when and why it is needed OR People never seem to understand what’s needed.
7. I’m reasonable with required timeframes when I ask someone to do something OR You have to keep the pressure on or people just let you down.
8. I usually sense when to offer help and assistance before I’m asked for it OR If you want me to do something ASK! I’m not a mind reader.
9. I love thanking people for work they do, and acknowledging their special efforts OR People are paid to do their work and should not need a thank you for every little thing they do!
10. If I say I will do something people know it will be done on time OR People should know I am overloaded so if something is late I shouldn’t have to explain myself.

Give yourself one point for each option A and zero for Option B. Are you a 10 at work?

Eve Ash has developed a wide range of assessment tools and training DVDs for self-development and management skill development.