Why is he having trouble working for a female boss?

Dear Aunty B,

I am a woman in my late 30s running a marketing company and I recently hired a guy the same age. He has lots of skills and I am considering promoting him but there is one problem. He often makes sarcastic comments that are put-downs. And I am usually the butt of the sarcasm.

For example, I am clumsy, so he will often pretend to trip over when he walks into a meeting. I also have a bad habit of taking people’s pens so he yells out “secure the furniture!” if I walk past.

I didn’t really take much notice of his put-downs until one of my staff brought it to my attention and suggested he had trouble working for a female boss. Now I am finding it very annoying, to the point I am thinking about letting him go. I have brought it up with him once and then he barely spoke to me for a few weeks before resuming the behaviour again.

He has a wife who works part-time and a mum who still does his washing!

My question is this: if he has trouble working for a female is there anything I can do about it? And is that the problem? I really don’t want to let him go.

Frustrated,
Melbourne

Dear Frustrated,

Who cares if you are female or where his problems stem from? He is disrespectful and a bully. Call him in and tell him you are sick and tired of the disrespect. Give him specific examples. Point out that no one else talks like that to you and you want it to stop immediately. Tell him other staff have noted his comments and a sarcastic culture is not the sort of culture you are cultivating.

Next time he does it publicly, stand up and ask to see him in your office. Shut the door after him and reprimand him privately. You will only have to do that once. He will get the message. Remember you’re the boss, you have goals to meet, you want staff working in a vibrant, exciting, positive culture and you don’t care who does his washing.

Good luck!
Your Aunty B

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