I am not a bully! So stick it!

Dear Aunty B,

I have been accused of being a bully by someone in an exit interview. The person was very immature and had emotional problems and when I tried to performance manage him, he saw it as picking on him.

My boss knew how difficult he was, so when I read the exit interview I didn’t expect my boss to take much notice. But my boss then called me in and while in one breath telling me that I had done a good job managing the employee out, said I should take note of the “allegation” and to make sure that there were no more complaints.

This has shocked me and made me feel really angry. At a time when I could have done with a bit of support I got a kick in the guts. I don’t have a bullying bone in my body. At our 360-degree reviews I get great feedback on my management style and this is the first time that anyone has leveled this at me. Between you and me, I feel like telling my boss to stick it!

Ms Nice Girl,
SA

Dear Ms Nice Girl,

You don’t like being told off, do you? Thought not. Look, you are making too much of this. Take the emotion out and send a little note to your boss saying you are taking the comments on board but you would also like to remind him or her of the great feedback you get from staff. Then cut and paste some comments from the 360-degree reviews. And then leave it at that!

Your boss is doing the right thing by conveying a comment made in an exit interview to you. Your boss is also making it clear that he will not tolerate bullying. But he is also signalling that he doesn’t want to spend his time having a D&M with you when he could be steering the business to heady new heights!

So move on.

Good luck,
Your Aunty B