Is gay a bad word?

Dear Aunty B,

One of my sales staff bats for the other side. He is very open about the fact. This has encouraged the blokes in the office to make a few jokes to his face about him being homosexual and they have also started to call him “Flossie” (he actually started that by using it as a sign off in an email). They also use the word gay in a disparaging way.

The only homosexuals I have known at work have been very private. I am in my 60s. Am I out of touch or are they out of line? And what does gay now mean?

A gentleman,
WA

Dear gentleman,

You are not out of touch. They are way out of line and you should step in now.

First, remind your sales guy that he should refer to himself with respect. Point out to him that “Flossie” is a disparaging term and he should regard himself in the same way you regard him: as a professional doing a great job.

Second, nip this teasing in the bud. There is a fine line between joshing and homophobia and many an insecure Aussie man has overstepped that mark.
Tell the “jokers” that it is not a joke and there will be no more references, jokey or otherwise, to your sales guy’s sexual orientation.

And remind them to address all colleagues in a professional manner in the workplace.

As to the word “gay”, how the hell would I know what it means? My grandmother uses it to describe a happy person, my mother uses it to describe a friend who lives with her friend who is also a her, and my teenage sons use it as the ultimate put down. So take your pick.

Good luck,
Aunty B

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