Business-making is (often) harder than baby-making — so why don’t we have ‘business showers’?

Everyone is familiar with the concept of a baby shower: a love and sandwich-filled gathering to formally celebrate the pending arrival of a new infant. And traditionally, to lavish the expectant mother with newborn essentials and encouraging words along the lines of:

“You’ve got this!”

“We’re with you!”

”Let me know if there’s anything I can do to help!”

Over the past eight years, my co-founder Mel and I have given birth six times — to four children and two businesses (Wedshed and now Gravy), yet we can count the number of “showers” we had on two fingers. And you bet they weren’t for the new ventures.

Sure, bringing both businesses into the world wasn’t quite the same (let’s just say we could still sneeze with confidence), but the journey since has been uncannily similar: relentless, uncertain, sacrificial, emotional, life-changing and ultimately, very rewarding. Both have made us roll with laughter, shed shared tears and reach for a bottle of wine many times — for both celebration and commiseration.

As we go through the startup process a second time with our digital gifting company Gravy, we started to wonder: if parenthood and running a small business have so many commonalities, why do we celebrate one and not the other?

Why on earth aren’t business showers a thing yet?

People who were regular SATC (that’s Sex and the City) watchers might recall the episode where Carrie Bradshaw decides she’s had jack of contributing to the constant stream of baby showers and engagement parties, knowing that these aren’t milestones she herself wasn’t planning on partaking in at the time. And so she “weds herself”, creating a registry at Manolo Blahnik for a pair of delightfully expensive shoes, and invites everyone she’s ever gifted to reciprocate her generosity.

That episode ran in 2003, and yet 20 years later we still struggle to give appropriate recognition to many of the biggest achievements in people’s lives if it doesn’t involve a diamond or a uterus — for example, launching a venture. Or, we only celebrate the founder once they’ve had some semblance of success — not right at the beginning when they’re finding their feet and truly need a cheer squad.

While there are a handful of Cinderella stories, the reality behind most rags-to-riches business tales is years of perseverance and plenty of setbacks. Take James Dyson for example — it took 15 years and 5,127 failed prototypes before his first cyclonic vacuum cleaner was proven successful. Or Yvon Chouinard, the founder of outdoor clothing company Patagonia, who started off selling climbing gear from the back of his car while living off canned cat tuna, potatoes, oatmeal and poached ground squirrel. Then there’s the infamous 100+ rejections that Melanie Perkins received before she and her co-founders were able to get to work on the coding of Australia’s darling Canva.

The point we’re trying to make is that business-making is hard — way harder* than baby-making (*for many: please know we understand first-hand the contraceptive pain plenty of families face) — and it deserves to be celebrated, too.

Could we make business showers as commonplace as baby showers? It starts with thinking about what we’d “shower”. We’re working on the platform to facilitate meaningful gifting for all occasions, but what to actually give?

Here are nine gift ideas to give to a founder who is bringing an idea into the world — many of which will only cost your time and goodwill. And we’re certain the process of giving them will feel just as good as receiving them.

Share an hour or two of your skillset

It could be a session on branding, or sales, or social media strategies, or SEO or communicating effectively, or PR, or managing cash flow — agree on a time when you can focus on sharing your area of expertise. It’ll flex your mentoring muscle and you’ll gain just as much from it.

Give the founder’s business a surprise shout-out on social media

A digital shout-out costs nothing but means so much. Whether it’s on LinkedIn, across your own social media or any other channels that make sense (e.g. private groups or forums you’re a part of), word-of-mouth is a gift that keeps on giving.

Offer a connection or intro with someone that can help

They say it’s not what you know but who you know that counts, and when it comes to experienced advice or investment, this old adage certainly has some weight. If you have a well-connected contact in the industry or know someone with a certain skill set who could share some wisdom, set them up on a blind business date and let destiny run its course.

Share a business book

If there’s a book you found particularly dial-moving, why not pass it on to a peer getting started? Alternatively, any great reads that provide a few hours of escapism are an equally awesome (and therapeutic) gift.

Create an epic playlist

It might sound trite, but running a small business can be a quiet gig at times, especially if you’re a one-man band or your team works remotely. Having some inspiring tunes to help get the creative juices flowing or to drown out the neighbourhood noises is a valuable gift indeed.

Podcast recommendations

Long commutes, cooking dinner and walking the dog can double as productive work time if you have a list of recommended podcasts to listen to. A shortlist of business-related pods will always be appreciated — and bonus points if you can recommend specific episodes that are relevant for where your friend is at.

Gift them a ceramic coffee cup

Caffeine and new business owners go together like bacon and eggs, Romeo and Juliet (minus the tragedy). Practical, prettier than a disposable cup, and environmentally friendly, this gift says thoughtful, and every time the founder takes a swig, they’ll think of you and the gesture of support this gift represents.

Tickets to a start-up event

Feed a knowledge-thirsty mind with tickets to an event for entrepreneurs. It’s a great opportunity for them to network with other founders, and ideally, they’ll gain some hot tips on running a business that they can apply to their own day-to-day operations. Bonus points if you accompany them for moral support and a networking buddy.

Brain-picking sessions

No matter whether you’ve gone through the experience of starting something yourself or you’re working as part of an ambitious team, every person has a valued perspective to share and will see things differently. Offer to grab a coffee (virtually is fine) and have a riff over the challenges that the founder is trying to solve. We promise your unique take will be appreciated.

The next step? If you’re starting something up, why not create a ‘business shower’ gift collection with your asks for help? Don’t feel weird about it. People want to help.

Or if you know someone on the journey, create a collection for them, share it with others in your mutual network to contribute to, and then make the founder’s year when you gift it to them. It’s a guaranteed feel-good exercise for all involved and it helps move the dial on recognising that many of life’s big moments don’t fit the cover of a Hallmark card.

Amy Parfett is the co-founder of Gravy — a gifting platform on a mission to enable the world’s most meaningful gifting in minutes. She is also the co-founder of Wedshed and an award-winning communicator and author.