I am in business with a harassing, abusive partner. What do I do?

Dear Aunty B,

If you and your business partner are running a million dollar Melbourne business and you and your business partner are effectively the head of the business, if your business partner harasses you, in the way of abusive emails (copying in other staff members) and in person (yelling and speaking condescendingly and humiliating you), with employees looking on (not to mention, the behaviour is greatly affecting your health), how do you file a harassment complaint?

Who do you go to for help if you don’t really have a HR dept?

Appreciate your help,

Soozie

Dear Soozie,

You are in business with a bully. Bullies are cowards. You have to have the strength to take on bullies or get away from them.

Forget about yourself for a minute. What on earth are you subjecting your staff to? How do you think your staff feel about being part of some war between yourself and your business partner? You have a duty of care to your staff to provide them with a healthy work place and you have described a toxic hellhole.

Your first port of call is to your shareholders agreement, which spells out what to do when relationships between business partners break down. You must have one! You don’t? Then second port of call is a lawyer to find out your options.

You need to get out of that situation now. It is unclear if you own the business. If you don’t, go and speak to the boss and outline the behaviour with evidence. If you do own the business you may need to offer to buy the business partner out or she/he can buy you out.

You also need to see a psychologist and work out why you are in business with such a bully and why you have let this appalling behaviour affect your staff and your health. So stop focusing on the bully’s behaviour and start focusing on the plan to get out. Life is too short to spend it with a person like this. Be determined and strong. And start to call his bluff – which is all it is. Take him into your office next time he is abusive and yell back. It always works and it sure of hell feels better than being a victim.

Be smart,
Your Aunty B

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